she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
