walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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