This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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