We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize