how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
