Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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