Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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