would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize