Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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