you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
