rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I wish i was in the wii world.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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