True but thats because hes a fetus.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I woke up under a house in Key West
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