Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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