your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize