If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
