apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
