Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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