Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
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