that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
