i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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