I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Randomize
