Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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