Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
