The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
