Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
