I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
