Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
