they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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