? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
