I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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