i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize