grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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