just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
