I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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