Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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