Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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