hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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