I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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