he puts the penis in happiness.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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