Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
A+ Viking dick
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
