she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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