his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
