If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
