I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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