my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
