i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
