we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize