I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
