i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize
