covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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